Aggressive parenting
Sep. 26th, 2016 10:16 amI was yelled at by strangers twice before 8:30 AM today.
First, because of a reasonable misunderstanding. J doesn't look disabled, so sometimes people get mad when he takes a parking spot.
Then we went for a teacher conference with A's 1st grade teacher. This began because every piece of work that A has brought home has been way too easy (like stuff he was doing 2 years ago). I sent an email to the teacher asking about it, and she asked that we come in.
And then she yelled at us.
It was an odd interaction, overall, because the information that went back and forth was basically what I wanted to hear. Were they doing things in math class that were harder than his homework book? Yes. Does he have the opportunity to read books that are harder than the ones he'd been bringing home? Yes. Is there a purpose to doing very simple reading exercises? Yes.
But on top of that, the woman actually started bickering with J. And I kind of get it. She was yelling at us (I think) because she regularly has to interact with Princeton parents, who are _involved_. It's not just about getting an education, it's about winning the race. She as much as said that we had hindered A's reading comprehension skills by focusing on speed (which is nonsense). I will absolutely cop to being an involved parent, and I refuse to believe I'm doing something wrong by checking in with the teacher to make sure he's being challenged.
I'm about the least touchy-feely person I know. I don't get offended easily. I'm surprised she's lasted, parents not all being as emotionally detached as me.
That said, the silver lining is that A is an extremely hard-headed, willful kid, and he knows how to handle adults. So it's probably a good thing that he has a teacher who will not take his shit. We discussed his behavior briefly, and the teacher pretty much had his number.
It took me a solid hour to get my heart-rate down, despite the fact that I heard exactly what I wanted to hear.
First, because of a reasonable misunderstanding. J doesn't look disabled, so sometimes people get mad when he takes a parking spot.
Then we went for a teacher conference with A's 1st grade teacher. This began because every piece of work that A has brought home has been way too easy (like stuff he was doing 2 years ago). I sent an email to the teacher asking about it, and she asked that we come in.
And then she yelled at us.
It was an odd interaction, overall, because the information that went back and forth was basically what I wanted to hear. Were they doing things in math class that were harder than his homework book? Yes. Does he have the opportunity to read books that are harder than the ones he'd been bringing home? Yes. Is there a purpose to doing very simple reading exercises? Yes.
But on top of that, the woman actually started bickering with J. And I kind of get it. She was yelling at us (I think) because she regularly has to interact with Princeton parents, who are _involved_. It's not just about getting an education, it's about winning the race. She as much as said that we had hindered A's reading comprehension skills by focusing on speed (which is nonsense). I will absolutely cop to being an involved parent, and I refuse to believe I'm doing something wrong by checking in with the teacher to make sure he's being challenged.
I'm about the least touchy-feely person I know. I don't get offended easily. I'm surprised she's lasted, parents not all being as emotionally detached as me.
That said, the silver lining is that A is an extremely hard-headed, willful kid, and he knows how to handle adults. So it's probably a good thing that he has a teacher who will not take his shit. We discussed his behavior briefly, and the teacher pretty much had his number.
It took me a solid hour to get my heart-rate down, despite the fact that I heard exactly what I wanted to hear.